&&this is the right turn, wrong universe--

FB: Nations

2009-03-23T08:05:42Z

There is an epic application on Facebook called Nations, and you play a leader who dictates policies and makes decisions about issues that arise within your nation. The issues vary from policies to social policies, to religious problems and general, random problems. All your decisions affect how the country grows, and statistics are included to show whether your country's growing positively or negatively in terms of social freedom, political freedom, education, technology, and other attributes.

It's fun, and doesn't take up more than five minutes per day. An example issue would be like the following:

An oil tanker has wrecked near the shoreline of your country, dumping thousands of tons of crude oil into the waters. Technically, however, the wreck did not happen within national waters, but it is almost certain that it will do damage to the country's environment. Do you:
- Start an initiative to clean up the spill and get people ready to clean the shoreline if the spill reaches the land?
- Initiate a cleanup effort only if the spilled crude oil reaches the beaches in Stella Cadente?
- Since it is not technically your problem until it reaches national waters, tell whoever spilled the oil that they are responsible to clean it up?

You make a choice, and a result is produced. You can receive up to a maximum of only two issues per day. Sometimes your choices will result in bad consequences for you or your nation, or turn out for the better.

Go play it today~!

Music Recommendations 1

2009-03-17T12:59:15Z

Here's a short list of songs, since MediaFire's being cruel to me. Or rather, my internet speed.

1. Forever Yours by Sunrise Avenue
http://www.mediafire.com/?02zic6um5yl
2. Again & Again by The Bird And The Bee
http://www.mediafire.com/?oxikz1lx11n
3. Good Morning Sun by Andi
http://www.mediafire.com/?tjmlh3limys
4. Mad Sky by Pierrot
http://www.mediafire.com/?jua2mbflmtj
5. Eleanor by Low Millions
http://www.mediafire.com/?imwj52zz424
6. Mad World by Gary Jules
http://www.mediafire.com/?ommzmwzmgjm
7. High by The Lighthouse Family
http://www.mediafire.com/?odynngj5dhy
8. Arise (Hammer and Funabashi Remix) by Ashkan Fardost and Mike Shiver
http://www.mediafire.com/?wa2nldyw8y7

If any links are broken, be sure to inform me. I'll gladly replace them~

Manga Recommendations 3

2009-03-15T08:50:14Z

I looked up recommendations for similar manga to some of those I like - and I discovered Psychometrer Eiji. Similar to Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro, minus the sadistic main character and shounen humour, and armed with art that matches that of Tokyo Crazy Paradise and Hana Yori Dango, it's about a boy with the ability of psychometry who aids a female detective to track down criminals. It's quite lovely so far, and I expect good things from this manga.

Also, if you're a Shinsengumi fan like I am, you may like this one-shot about Okita Souji's last days. It's called Because Goodbyes Are Coming Soon and ends with his death. Quite a serious piece without distracting bishounen artwork.

On the other hand, if you're into something more fictional, but equally entertaining and more romance-themed, try Kaze Hikaru. It's about a girl who cross-dresses to get into the Shinsengumi. Great for the Okita fans, once more.

Top 20 Manga

2009-03-14T10:55:38Z

Here they are - my top twenty favourite manga of the moment. I've tried to rank them in order of 'most favourite to subtly cherished', but I believed I've failed at even that. If you haven't read them yet, do so now~! I promise you with all my soul that you won't regret it.

1. Monster by Urasawa Naoki
2. Fullmetal Alchemist by Arakawa Hiromu
3. Boys Next Door by Yuki Kaori
4. Majin Tantei Nougami Neuro by Matsuei Yuusei
5. Liar Game by Kaitani Shinobu
6. Rurouni Kenshin by Watsuki Nobuhiro
7. Peacemaker & Peacemaker Kurogane by Chrono Nanae
8. Pluto by Urasawa Naoki
9. Skip Beat! by Nakamura Yoshiki
10. Death Note by Ohba Tsugumi & Obata Takeshi
11. Dolls by Naked Ape
12. One Piece by Eiichiro Oda
13. Gintama by Hideaki Sorachi
14. Claymore by Yagi Norihiro
15. Earl Cain Series by Yuki Kaori
16. Vampire Knight by Hino Matsuri
17. Hana-Kimi by Nakajo Hisaya
18. Bakuman by Ohba Tsugumi & Obata Takeshi
19. Change123 by Sakaguchi Iku & Iwasawa Shiuri
20. Souten no Koumori by Arakawa Hiromu

By the way, if any of you know where I can find further scans of Dolls by Naked Ape and Peacemaker & Peacemaker Kurogane by Chrono Nanae, please do inform me!

Belated V-Day 2009 Soundtrack

2009-03-13T10:41:51Z

I uploaded these babies on Facebook, so it's not available to everyone. Hence, why I'm posting them here too. I know that V-Day this year is long gone, but these are some of my favourite songs, which I believe fit the theme of love.

PassingAvery's V-Day 2009 Soundtrack
1. "Heavy Starry Chain" by Tommy heavenly6 http://www.mediafire.com/?2qnnz1z1ajn
2. "Pure Shores" by All Saints http://www.mediafire.com/?2dmnwvwmkgm
3. "Wish" by Olivia Lufkin http://www.mediafire.com/?3jtwzfynwmp
4. "Danger" by Etro Anime http://www.mediafire.com/?mwp3e2z5in9
5. "Starless Night" by Olivia Lufkin http://www.mediafire.com/?fgw50duzdq0
6. "Must Be Dreaming" by Frou Frou http://www.mediafire.com/?4o9ngjmmfwn
7. "I'd Rather Be In Love" by Michelle Branch http://www.mediafire.com/?drdazanod5z
8. "Love Today" by Mika http://www.mediafire.com/?dxbyuzretoy
9. "Shh..." by Frou Frou http://www.mediafire.com/?tkobdkd4mfx
10. "You Look So Fine" by Garbage http://www.mediafire.com/?zotijhgmyno
11. "Promises" by Lillix http://www.mediafire.com/?6zzw1itj4tx
12. "#1 Crush" by Garbage http://www.mediafire.com/?lthyg0qwxka
13. "What I Like About You" by Lillix http://www.mediafire.com/?xnvj3jqmnqd
14. "Built To Last" by Melee http://www.mediafire.com/?i2gijdzlojm
15. "Starlight" by Muse http://www.mediafire.com/?yt2wduiztnt
16. "Be With You" by Enrique Iglesias http://www.mediafire.com/?gxnuynjyfqu
17. "Gravity of Love" by Enigma http://www.mediafire.com/?dnklyotbl2e
18. "Close To You" by The Carpenters http://www.mediafire.com/?hjj45dawimz
19. "Tian Xia Wu Shuang" by Jane Zhang Liang Ying http://www.mediafire.com/?lnnxa2gtyji

Have fun. <3 Hope you enjoy them~!

MangaFox GFX Team Applications

2009-03-13T06:22:28Z

In a previous post or two, I mentioned one of the online manga reading sites called MangaFox. Well, I'd like to bring to attention its upcoming GFX Team - members will be decided through their portfolios (tag walls). It'll be thoroughly based on skill alone, so if you think you're up for it and have the time to commit to MF and our forum graphics, feel free to join.

The application detail threads can be found here and here.

Due Date: 6th April 2009
Members To Be Admitted: 2 [max, for now]

--

Also, on further note, a MangaFox Editorial Team will be started soon. The application information threads will be posted soon.

Online Manga Reading Sites

2009-01-18T14:21:56Z

Yeah, the ones where you click on pages to turn them. Not really for download, unless you right click --> save each page (which is such a hassle, really). For downloads, one of the best sources is probably #lurk on IRC (Google it for details).

I'm loyal to two of them --

The first being OneManga.com - one of the first of its kind. Or rather, probably the most famous online manga reading site to this day. Its updates are very quick, and people flood their servers whenever the Weekly Shounen Jump chapters come out (and this usually results in an immediate server strain).

The second one is MangaFox.com - well known for its immense manga collection (almost everything is there, all freely uploaded by members of the site). It's amazing, especially if you're searching for a manga that OneManga doesn't have. MangaFox is actually the newer sister site of the old time famous animeEDEN.com anime download site. I highly recommend both of these sites. They're run well, have amazing layouts, and have great, lively communities.

Go check them out today~!

Manga Recommendations 2

2009-01-08T11:40:39Z

I've started rereading some old manga from old times (such as FMA, even though it's still ongoing), and I'd like to recommend some of them that stand out to be (or once did, anyway). Probably the one that really lured me into the world of anime and manga was Rurouni Kenshin. Some of you know it better as the anime series called Samurai X - the one about the legendary Hitokiri Battousai who's currently living in the Meiji Era. I'd say that this one truly left its impression on me, initially, because of the way I could just relate to the characters, and the way they interacted with each other. The fight scenes were interesting too - I remember being so addicted that I couldn't even bear missing an episode! The one thing that the anime failed to bring to life, however, was the final arc of the manga, the Jinchuu Arc, which included Kenshin's past and Enishi's revenge. The OVAs don't even come close to covering it. Then again, the ending to the OVAs really differed from the manga - Kenshin, the main character, did not die from a disease. Not at all. There was a happy ending (though as a fan, I was upset - I didn't want it to ever end).

Another hit manga from those days also included Black Cat. I must say, the concepts did remind me of Rurouni Kenshin though. But can you blame the mangaka, really? His mentor was none other than Obata Takeshi, the legendary mangaka of Death Note, Hikaru no Go, and Bakuman fame - who also mentored Watsuki Nobuhiro of Rurouni Kenshin. See a link there?

Speaking of which - Death Note was a very good manga. One of the best psychological thrillers in the world of manga to this day. I would not recommend Hikaru no Go, however, despite its good beginning and middle. The ending will disappoint you. Go read it if you wish, but remember - you were warned!

Anyway, here are a few manga you should all go and look up and check out (which started a long time ago, even if they're not finished yet):
Dragonball
Elfen Lied
Absolute Boyfriend - The j-drama can be found here.
Imadoki!
Hana-Kimi - The j-drama can be found here.
Hana Yori Dango - The j-drama can be found here.
Tokyo Crazy Paradise
Monster
Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles
Cardcaptor Sakura
Naruto
Bleach
One Piece
Hunter x Hunter
Air Gear
Claymore
Fullmetal Alchemist

FB: Ghost Trappers

2009-01-08T11:13:22Z

I found another Facebook application just a few days ago, called Ghost Trappers. It's a little like MouseHunt and Fish Wrangler, though it's based in Scotland, and the goal is to hunt for ghosts with whiskey! And we aren't exterminating the ghosts here; we're just snapping photos of them as evidence. It's quite cute, really, and the concept is really epic. It's still quite a new application, so we'll have to give it time to grow and become better.

For an hour after midnight every night, everyone is given the opportunity to snap up to three photos of rare "Midnight Ghosts". In other words, it opens up to a rare variety of even more ghosts you can capture!

So go sign up, be an agent, and start hunting for adorable ghosts with whiskey!

Extra Links:
GT Wiki

FB: MouseHunt

2009-01-05T08:27:37Z

For those of you who have Facebook, this is an application you might want to add (if you don't mind another addiction): MouseHunt. It's quite different from the norm, actually, and the only other application that seems to be like it is Fish Wrangler. MouseHunt has really amazing graphics, a never-ending goal (since it's still in development and more areas and features are being added each time).

Upon joining, you earn the title of a Novice Hunter, and your primary location is the Town of Gnawnia. (You're given the choice of choosing the High Tension Spring or the Tacky Glue Trap to begin with. I recommend the High Tension Spring for sheer power). Your goal is to click the trumpet/horn that appears at the top of your page to start a hunt. A hunt is held every 15 minutes, and it allows you to check your trap to see if you catch any mice. Your goal in the game is to go on as many hunts as possible, restock your cheese (always arm your trap with at least 15 pieces at all times), and upgrade your traps when you reach a certain amount of points/gold.

The more active you are, the more quickly your activity bar (the percentage thing under your rank) will rise. When you reach a new rank, you can move on to other places to hunt in. Your goal is to discover more places, hunt for new mice, and simply rising to become the best hunter you can be!

I've found that the higher up you go, the more there is to look forward to, and cooler mice to catch! There are vampire mice, lycan mice, mobster mice, diamond mice, kung fu mice, assassin mice, elf mice, and so much more~! Go check it out today. You honestly won't regret it.

More MouseHunt links (that might help in gameplay):
MH Wiki
MH Forums/Boards
MH Travel Planner
MH News - "The Nibbler"

Here are some other interesting applications you might want to check out:
Pet Society
Geo Challenge
Word Challenge
Fish Wrangler
Nations
Crusades
Robot Builder

Momiji

2009-01-03T14:32:17Z

Allow me to introduce y'all to a brand I find very unique. And expensive - but probably worth its money, as it's quite rare. It's called Momiji and it can be found online here. They're hard to find (in limited countries only, as shown here), but you can order/buy them online~! And yes, yes, I actually do own some Momiji merchandise. I was lucky enough to find a mini-store that sold them (though they swore they'd be gone by new year's and... well, it's new year's already).

I own Hurray (a Momiji 'Celebrations' doll) as well as a sheet of pretty stickers. Mine actually look a tad bit different from those displayed there, but they're about the same. I bought the Momiji doll in the pretty zip-locked plastic bag (it came with a themed mini badge and three stickers too). I can't bear to use the stickers at all. They're absolutely adorably precious~

Their main features are the Momiji dolls - sold in a variety of wrappings (chinese boxes or plastic bags which are adorable), and at their bases, they contain a slip of paper where you can write messages/dedications on). They're pretty heavy as well, so they'd make great paper-weights, if you're not just collecting them for the sake of keeping them as collector's items.

Go check them out, and buy them if you want. Or order them for a loved one!

A Time of Change

2009-01-02T15:25:46Z

A Time of Change

Original: Rurouni Kenshin by Watsuki Nobuhiro. Standard disclaimers apply.
Summary: For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven... An AoshixMisao one-shot addressing the changes that they experience during the Meiji Era.
Any Pairings: Shinomori Aoshi & Makimachi Misao. Not really a romance piece - more like a realistic portrayal of what happened to them as time passed by.
Extra Notes: The attire and appearances that I used all derive from Kenshin Kaden, the finale of the manga. There was once a fan (I've forgotten the source! Eek!) who made the observation (after research) that Misao's clothing in Kenshin Kaden was actually that of a university student during the era, so I've used that in my short story.

A Time of Change

"For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven..."
~ Ecclesiastes 3:1

----

She had cut her hair.

The long, braided ponytail that once adorned and complimented Misao's agile form was replaced by short, shoulder-length locks that fell loosely around her shoulders, accentuating the youthful dimples than illuminated her visage. Like sunshine, wherever she sauntered off to, she lit up the place, introducing an unrivaled quality of joy into the environment, just as she always did in the confines of the Aoiya inn.

Gone was the past as the East modernized, adopting values and cultures from the Western world, transforming into a likened image of its Western counterparts.

And gone was her hair, and in its place a modern hairstyle, popular amongst the youth - or so it seemed. No longer did she keep the hair that her friends once declared beautiful, and which she had chosen to tie up in a feeble attempt to deny her femininity - to become a spy. A spy in an era that demanded less for the proud intelligence networks who dominated the previous era, and more for businesses and goals of peace.

Gone were her strange attires which once represented her pride as a member of the Oniwabanshu. The light, cooling, and comfortable clothes that could never accentuate her figure were replaced by a uniform consisting of a hakama and gi, and her training sandals were replaced by boots. Ugly, she had called it. Recognition as a member of a growing, youthful educated force, the Meiji had overruled, declaring the uniform compulsory for those who enrolled into the reformed colleges.

Gone were the darkened outfits that once signified their clan, and the yukata that Aoshi chose to wear during his visits to the temple. No, his stays at the temple - after all, he spent more time there than back in the inn where they all belonged. Misao had seen the transformation of Shinomori Aoshi; from a former Okashira to a man who now donned a Westernized Gentlemen's attire - what they called business suits, with buttoned, collared undershirts, vests, coats, a tie, and long trousers. Strap-like devices called belts had overtaken the need for an obi too. Aoshi looked so different now, but his sharp facial features never wavered, never changed; he was just as beautiful now as he was back then, an epitome of the traditional dashing heroes in the romantic novels which were translated into Japanese. However, he had taken a piece of the past with him, sporting a short ponytail that Misao found to be quite adorable, yet peculiar. It took some getting used to, supported by the countless past tales whipped up by Okina, who bantered about the previous hairstyles of Aoshi during his youth, in some counterproductive attempt to explain this abrupt abnormality Aoshi had chosen to adorn.

Gone were his combat gloves, replaced by the spotless, tailored silk that wrapped around his fingers. A gentleman's gloves, as Okon liked to call it. Now, Misao supposed, the only thing missing was a cigar... or what they called 'beer'.

It was more for the sake of the Oniwabanshu, though the physical acceptance of Western fashion in some way symbolized Aoshi's development of peace for the current government, and the exorcism of a vicious, bloodstained past. The fire of vengeance, determination, and destruction that once elicited his eyes was no more, calmed by the passive support of those around him, the hours of meditation, and the tea that Misao served him everyday. The process was long, but rewarding in more ways than one.

Misao had been asked to step down from her hierarchical position of the Okashira, as her studies prioritized her life. Of course, more-than-subtle coaxes that the leader of the Oniwabanshu required a top-notch education in the modern world had left her reluctantly accepting this fate. Yet, she clung to the title once worn by her grandfather, leaving Aoshi with the responsibility of assisting the Okashira while she took her educational leave. It was years since the demand for peace had separated the infamous group, but their connections still held, and the network was revived once again - with Aoshi as their acting head. Her beloved was swept away to numerous, but necessary conference and business after-parties, rendering Misao green with envy at the thought that her Aoshi lay within the physical grasp of other women - other beautiful, rich, and glamorous socialites. He was a crafted masterpiece, after all; and women tended to overlook the emotionless, impassive demeanor that plastered quite comfortably across his visage, becoming the usual expression of his face.

Gone was the childish infatuation for Aoshi that gripped her heart during her every waking moment as a child. Instead, what replaced it was the realisation that Aoshi was not exactly hers, though unmistakable blushes of cerise continued to redden her cheeks at the mention of his name. Misao understood that patience had a greater chance of drawing his interest rather than her deliberate, obsess-fuelled attempts to force what she called love onto him. Gone was the little girl who demanded to see her Aoshi-sama when classes ended in the evening.

One thing did not change, however, though everything else soared timelessly into the past before blending shamelessly into the present.

Makimachi Misao still found the time to bring Aoshi his tea, and with this, the changing developments of Japan ceased to matter, and all troubles seemed to melt away. He liked green tea, and she would commence their conversations with enquiries about his conferences, rather than trivial bickering about herself.

She only wished to see a charming smile across his lips, completely unaware that he had already begun to smile on the inside.

Gone was the little girl Aoshi had promised to protect, and in her place blossomed a beautiful woman, all grown up.

Manga Recommendations

2009-01-02T15:10:34Z

I've found a good manga to read recently, entitled Pluto. It's done by two mangaka - Urasawa Naoki and Tezuka Osamu. Some of you may recognize the name Urasawa Naoki from his 20th Century Boys and 21st Century Boys fame, or even his spectacular Monster fame. An awesome mangaka who specializes in psychological thrillers and mysteries, Pluto is not a manga to be missed. In my opinion, it's just about as good as Monster, though this one's set in the future (or so it seems). No child-Hitler-breeding this time, though it's quite international once more with settings all over Europe, including Turkey and England, just as Monster was set in Germany. Pluto's set in a world where robots and humans co-exist (robots even have equal rights to humans, though they still suffer some degree of discrimination - kind of like the typical racial discrimination we see in society today), and the manga begins with the murder of a world famous role model/hero, who's a robot, and once again - each chapter introduces more characters, murders (serial killings once more, all linked mysteriously), mostly from the view of a detective (who, yes, is a robot too, though he looks exactly like a human). I highly recommend it, though the series hasn't concluded yet, so you'll probably have to wait for more (the scans come out irregularly, it seems, so we might have to wait months) if you read through it too quickly.

If you're into psychological thrillers, Urasawa Naoki's definitely your god-on-earth for this genre, but Liar Game by Kaitani Shinobu is pretty good too. There's even a j-drama for it (through I think the plotline deviates quite a little from canon, since the manga is far from finished and still ongoing. The drama has quite a few famous actors and actresses including Toda Erika from Death Note fame, Matsuda Shota from Hana Yori Dango (he played Soujiro of the F4), and the very attractive Kichise Michiko who's also in Bloody Monday.

Another few good manga that have caught my eye include Change123 (possibly the only manga other than MPD Psycho that contained a main character with a split personality disorder), Bakuman, and Takeru. Change123 is a little ecchi though, so if you don't like random partial nudity and sexual innuendos, avoid it. (I like Fu, by the way. Go read to find out what I mean. Hehe~) Bakuman, on the other hand, is another awesome manga done by the collaboration genius of Obata Takeshi and Ohba Tsugumi from Death Note fame. It's about two young boys who want to take on the world of manga (kind of like the authors themselves, really) and become uber famous. It's quite cute. There are some romantic elements too, including a girl who wants to become a popular seiyuu (voice actor). It comes out weekly, since it's a feature in the Weekly Shounen Jump, alongside One Piece, Naruto, and Bleach. Thirdly, Takeru - Opera Susanoh Sword of the Devil (yeah, long name) is a lesser known manga, but an interesting one based on a legendary sword. Lots of traditional shounen elements (though not so dominant), and the setting is really nice (very amazonian-like too) too. You might this one fun to read in your spare time - it's ongoing, and the chapters come really slowly. But check it out anyway~!

Now onto one-shots! Remember Hiromu Arakawa? The mangaka of the currently ongoing FMA? It turns out that she had a few published one-shots too! I read two of them (if there are more, I haven't seen/found them yet) - Souten no Koumori and Stray Dog. As usual, Arakawa-sensei manages to play on the reader's emotions, though it's hardly as intense as FMA, if you've read that (of course you have, go read it if you haven't, it's genius). Stray Dog contains elements of unethical experimentation (kind of like FMA, in a way, though no alchemy). It didn't really stand out to be though, unlike Souten no Koumori - this one was really good. It's about a girl who's actually an ex-assassin during a civil war of some sort, and she ends up having to protect the people safeguarding her. It ends quite sadly, in a beautiful sort of way. Oh, yeah. She has a bat-shaped birthmark on her face too. That was cool~

Anyway, that's all for today. Here are some extra links to some famous manga that I keep up to date with (for simply being awesome/unique/well done for its genre): One Piece, Vampire Knight, Skip Beat! Have fun!

The World Forgetting, By The World Forgot

2009-01-02T10:43:04Z

The World Forgetting, By The World Forgot

Original: Rurouni Kenshin by Watsuki Nobuhiro. Standard disclaimers apply.
Summary: [Post Jinchuu Arc] Megumi thought that only hope lay ahead of her as she prepared to depart for Aizu, but a new frightening reality unraveled before her in the form of a man she buried long ago in her past: Takeda Kanryuu.
Any Pairings: Undetermined. I’m hoping to work on various pairings between characters (if possible), rather than focusing on just one.
The Origin of the Title: Extracted from the lovely poem ‘Eloisa to Abelard’ by Alexander Pope. “The world forgetting" means that the world, or more precisely - the people of the world, are losing the memory of something. "By the world forgot" means that they have already forgotten it. The phrase basically means that if nobody makes an effort to remember something or an event, it will fade from existence as though it never existed in the first place or occurred.

Chapter One
Dreaming Without Colour

Takani Megumi was not one who spoke of her nightmares. Nightmares, she called them, rather than dreams – for that is what they were to her and she was a realist; there was no sense in calling something by any other name if it wasn’t true. Her nightmares had varied across time – they had started as dreams, as a child, spinning carefully from a cluster of coloured euphoria into moldy black and white by the time she matured through her youth. It was when her dreams lost their colour that she realized that sleep was no longer a sanctuary of comfort, but a door to another world of horrors, woven carefully by fragments of her subconscious mind.

The nightmares had started with doorways and obstacles, chasing after her family as they vanished one by one, running further ahead of her – and with her powerless legs, she could never keep up. She figured that she was lonely then – dreams were hardly lies if they reflected people you knew based on situations you might have once experienced. Megumi was looking for them, after all, but she always failed to catch up to them in her dreams. She wondered if the remainder of her life would continue that way – searching for them but failing to find them; she hated those nightmares, for they reflected her greatest fear.

Her nightmares took a twist when she pursued her medical career with that lovely doctor in Tokyo. Becoming his assistant almost immediately after showing her willingness to study and learn, living up to her family’s name as she did so, she started to dream about her patients. Sometimes she’d see their faces, while other times she saw faceless strangers – they all came to her for help, but she always failed and they’d come back to haunt her. The colour returned a little in those dreams, but only in one shade – scarlet blood on her hands, smearing the black and white walls of pseudo-security. She would cry and cry in those dreams, but she always saw through her tears and memorized the horrified facial expressions of her failures on the operation table. She’d wake up with shivers of cold in the night soon after, and realize that she hadn’t failed at all and that the nightmares were only nightmares and nothing more.

Megumi’s nightmares were eventually replaced by sinister portraits of guilt that drowned her in a bottomless ocean of red – red, yes, but this time it wasn’t blood. These nightmares came alive during her captivity in Takeda Kanryuu’s mansion – the doctor she had worked for had been slain by the cruel businessman by then, and so it was she who worked on the creation of opium for the man’s petty business that thrived on misery. Her nightmares were oh-so-red then, but the red wasn’t thick like blood, because she never saw the deaths of the addicts whose lives she took. She read about them in the newspapers, or heard about them in the corridors of the mansion, and every now and then on her monitored outings to town she saw addicts scrambling to purchase more opium with their meager salaries or stolen money. She witnessed the horror that she created, but she saw no blood – she only bore the cruel conscience that she was an indirect murderer of the body and soul.

She didn’t call herself a doctor again until the man named Himura Kenshin saved her life and touched her mind. That was when the nightmares stopped and colour returned to her dreams once again.

----

Megumi clenched her teeth and opened her eyes to the dark ceiling as she woke from her sleep. Her mind registered the nightmare; it was the first one she had had in a long time. Her palms were sweaty, and a clammy stickiness had claimed her body. An uncomfortable strain welled up in her neck – she must have pulled a muscle in her sleep. Facing the ceiling, she took a deep breath and counted to ten; with each breath, she convinced herself that it was only a bad dream, and nothing more. Yet, the malicious feeling that daunted her lingered under her skin, refusing to go away. Bolting upright in her futon, she looked around, her eyes scanning every inch of the room for the presence of a hidden stranger or shadow, but found neither. Relieved, she let her eyes adjust to the dark before stumbling out of her room.

She had been grateful to Kaoru for letting her stay another night as she tended to everyone’s wounds periodically – Sanosuke’s hand had to be examined quite often, after all. She was particularly worried for Kenshin; hopefully the battle with Yukishiro Enishi was his last – his own technique was taking a toll on his slender body, and she never failed to voice her disapproval when it came to his waning health. Perhaps everyone else saw Kenshin as timeless, or perhaps an invincible immortal of a swordsman, but as a doctor, she knew his physique best – another heavy battle just wouldn’t do. Megumi entrusted this serious piece of knowledge most of all with Kaoru – she was Kenshin’s most precious person, after all, and hopefully she’d see to it that he wouldn’t push himself to his limits ever again. Secretly, Megumi hoped to never have to treat his wounds ever again; she hated her knowledge as a doctor when it came to Kenshin – she hated watching his body break down bit by bit, even if he seemed marginally fine on the surface.

Megumi never spoke her innermost thoughts aloud, and one of them was that small sparks of envy ignited whenever she saw Kenshin and Kaoru together. The whole affair of Enishi’s revenge had shown her that they belonged together and that nobody would ever be able to tear them apart; acceptance had come a long time ago but she still longed in her mind – a little wishful thinking never hurt anyone. Yet, as a doctor, she was obligated to touch her patients, and she cherished every passing moment she spent tending to Kenshin’s wounds – touching but never truly possessing, she called it. There was always sincerity in the man’s eyes and she appreciated the thankfulness he reflected through them, even before he spoke the actual words.

Megumi knew that she would always love him, even though she would easily move on and find another one day. Kenshin and Kaoru belonged together after all – star-crossed, she called them.

The night was calm and she felt the stickiness on her body cool down with a passing breeze. She felt secure in the Kamiya residence, though she knew that she would be leaving soon to become a doctor in Aizu. There were plenty of people in need of doctors in that district, and she knew that she would be able to put her skills to good use there. Also, as everyone else had figured out in a heartbeat, she knew that Aizu was the one place where she had a chance to truly search for her lost family members. She never truly knew what happened to them or where they split up to – and now the opportunity had finally arrived for her to unravel her missing past.

Yet, why had the tarnished black and white returned to haunt her dreams?

Her nightmare had not been fictional – it was a flashback; a clear, concise one comprising of random snippets of her past. It was almost real; like she was reliving her past, listening to those voices, and feeling the myriad of emotions that once robbed her idealism and replaced it with hostile cynicism. She had seen the face of Takeda Kanryuu there, held the poisonous opium in her hands, and drowned in the crushing pangs of guilt for the first time in a long, long while. Kanryuu’s words were crystal clear – that Takani Megumi belonged to him, whether or not she enjoyed it, and that she would follow him in both his rise and fall. There was no-one to save her in this nightmare – Kenshin and the others weren’t there to rescue her; nobody took her hand as she was dragged down to hell by the drug lord. That was when she had woken up, sweaty from the heat she thought were the flames.

Collapsing against one of the supporting wooden beams of the dojo, Megumi stared out into the night, afraid to close her eyes in fear that the flames would return once more.

----

“Megumi-dono,” a voice broke through her conscience, pausing, before speaking her name once more, “Megumi-dono.”

She felt a hand on her shoulder, shaking her gently, and she stirred from her slumber. Her eyes flickered for a moment, attempting to adjust to the bright morning sun that pierced her pupils.

“Ken-san?” she mumbled, recognizing the distinctive red head kneeling before her. Looking around, she realized that she had fallen asleep on the open corridor outside her room.

“Why were you sleeping out here? It’s unhealthy, Megumi-dono.” Kenshin asked, concerned.

“I guess I had a bad dream, that’s all.” Megumi replied, smiling weakly, “It’s nothing to worry about.”

“Your worries will be gone soon, won’t they?” he returned a smile, “In just a few days, you’ll return to Aizu, and find your family again.”

“Yes, I should hope so.” Megumi nodded, taking Kenshin’s helping hand to pull herself up. She took a moment to inhale the fresh air, catching the scent of burning breakfast from the direction of the kitchen.

“Honestly,” she coughed, “You’re letting Kaoru-chan cook?” It smells bad even from here. “You should have woken me up earlier, or asked Misao-chan to do it instead.”

“Ah, we’ll be missing your cooking once you’re gone.” Kenshin said, “Yahiko especially.”

“Then… If Kaoru-chan lets, I’ll cook dinner for you all tonight.”

“That sounds great, Megumi-dono. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.”

----

Preview (Chapter Two): That same day, Megumi heads down to the marketplace, in search of ingredients for the dinner she’s planning to cook for her friends, when she sights a familiar, haunting face amongst the distant crowd… Could it be that her nightmare was a premonition for something even more sinister than before?